The Challenge, and Power, of Impatient Patience
Yeah, I struggle with it too.
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Just before dawn on Wednesday morning, I was sitting on the porch and doing some catchup reading while enjoying my morning coffee when I first heard the grumble of trucks coming up the dirt road.
There has been no activity on the home-building front for over two weeks, so this was a bit unexpected yet welcomed.
They pulled on to my lot, unloaded the big backhoe, and got to work within minutes.
I smiled, but only briefly as we have been doing this dance for 6 months now.
I set the coffee down and watched them work with amazing speed and precision, ripping a three-foot gouge into the hard-packed dirt where our abode will sit.
Experts in their trade, the work was disciplined and precise.
It's almost like they’ve done this before. I kid, they told me they do about three jobs a day, so they know how to get it done.
They dug the trenches for the foundation, packed up the little tractor, and left.
Nothing has happened since.
We are now seven months behind in starting our casita, which puts us seven months behind our goal of being in it this past September.
Most of the holdups have been procedural, bureaucratic, and silly, but we keep smiling and hoping for the best.
By the way, none of this is on our builder, just a lot of time getting approvals, permits, approvals to get permits, permits to get approvals, and other assorted crap that takes weeks and sometimes months.
(Don’t get me started… heh)
We have had a lot of setbacks, but at this point, the pad is made, the lumber has been purchased, and we have made significant modifications to the desert for plumbing and electricity.
We call these “sunk costs” since if we just get pissed, throw our hands into the sky, and threaten to do ungodly destruction and mayhem upon anyone else standing in our way… which I may or may not do weekly… we would lose a lot of money.
At those times, my ever-so-patient wife reminds me of something I truly believe in.
“It’s OK to be impatient if you manage the patience.”
I know it will take what it takes to get the house built, but I am actively doing everything I can to make that happen and not letting the slowness of the process get me down. I work every day.
Busy picking paints, furniture, and fixtures… we have filled our notebooks with ideas, prices, and suggestions. I am busy designing the tortoise enclosure - complete with a watering hole and a small waterfall… heh.
The art of patient impatience.
What does that mean?
It means that to do anything important, or with excellence, you have to be patient. Impatience means you practice what you want with constant vigor, so you can measure your progress to the goal.
Patience means doing the work, practicing what needs to be practiced, and growing in all aspects of what you need to know to be successful.
If you want to be an opera singer, you probably know that it will take many hours of practice, rehearsal, exercises, and mentorship before you get a shot at Puccini.
Chances are you won’t wake up one day and be an opera diva without the hours and discipline needed.
We call that understanding patience.
So you realize that you must sing scales every morning, sing with coaches every afternoon, learn the repertoire, practice, practice, practice. You do it as often as you can, measuring the improvement, focusing on what is not coming fast enough, and deliberately becoming better at singing.
We call that impatience.
You have to be able to wait it out, but every moment you are waiting it out, you are working toward the excellence you desire.
Now you could for sure think, “Hey, it would be cool to be an opera star cause they get to sing and wear great costumes and break wine glasses and stuff”.
And you would be right. Absolutely. I love those hats with the bull horns on them… cool.
And then you can choose to do absolutely nothing to achieve it. Oh, maybe you find a singing coach who you see every week unless you are busy, there’s a TV show you want to watch, or you want to go to the beach and hang out with friends.
That we call, well, we call it bullshit.
A photographer I know shoots every opportunity they get. If there is time on the weekend, they shoot. During the week, they shoot before work, and after work, and carry a camera with them at lunch.
They have prioritized the effort needed to become good at their craft. While they are building their portfolio, they know it will be a year before they can monetarily make the break to pro by going part-time at work.
They have a plan, are saving money, and are making the images for the portfolio they will need when next August rolls around.
And it is going to be a damn nice portfolio. I’ll share when it’s ready.
Patient. Impatience.
Understand that it will take time, then grasp onto the work and go at it 100%.
“I can only do 70% because of life stuff”, comes a voice in the back, “will that doom me to a living of cubicles and performance reviews?”
No.
That is not what I mean. We have lives and families and commitments that we must honor. We all have that. No one can dedicate 100% of their time to something - anything.
What I mean, is that you prioritize the work, and the time you have, and never use excuses, although there may be reasons, and get it done. There’s a bigass difference between a reason and an excuse. I know you know that.
Just get.
It done.
That means deliberately working and creating and not ‘fitting it in between “Matlock”, and Pokemon.
Make a plan that allows for the time it takes to get good. Create a system for making sure you get there on time, ready, and prepared. Work the plan with steady growth.
I preach patient impatience to all my students, but it is a very thin line between doing what needs to be done with focus and action and finding excuses to not commit to what must be accomplished.
This week I asked my students how many potential clients they had contacted this week.
And I was a bit disappointed.
The answer should have been 15 or more.
That is three contacts per day, five days a week.
It’s easy, and it is simple when you have the system down.
And it takes less than 10 minutes per day to do.
And this is where I caution that too much patience means nothing happens.
If you understand that you are marketing today for jobs next February, that means you understand the patience part. This week’s marketing email will most likely not result in a job by Thursday; we are building up trust for a job sometime next April, maybe.
Get it?
If you are sending out emails, postcards, and leaving voicemails—at least three a day, every day - you got the impatience part down. Phone calls count, as do client meetings and networking events. (Yes, they can be somewhat icky at times, but put on some grown-up shoes and have a drink with people who need your services even if they don’t realize it.)
Impatient, patience.
You need both.
Act with impatience while embracing the patience it takes to get to the goal line.
(Insert football analogy of your choice here.)
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